i think my mom watched the whole time
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Randomize
