so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
