Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
