shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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