Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
