i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
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