That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
