so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
