well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
She needs sedatives and a leash
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
