therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
