I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
