Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
