we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
