I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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