just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
it's like iHOP with fire
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Bring me that man meat
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
