I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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