And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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