ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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