Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
