Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
