does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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