I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
you would pick up someone in the library
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
