didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
