maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Randomize
