I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
