I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize