I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
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