cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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