Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
