Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
