I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
You smell like stripper and shame
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
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