Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Randomize
