epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I can't trust your balls anymore.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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