Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
