I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
