Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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