I heard we made out
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize