Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
