I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize