OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
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I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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