i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
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