The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
