he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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