I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
