***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
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