Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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