? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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