You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
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