maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I think a kid would responsible me up
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Randomize
