We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
