Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Randomize
