I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
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