Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
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